Collision of Egos to Joy of Giving

While taking a glance through the “Times of India” this morning, I got curious when I saw some thing with a heading “Collision” in the regular space provided for the regular articles/columns on “The Speaking Tree“. Being into a profession which deals with the word – collision (Packet/Frame Collision) at-least 100 times a day, I could not hold my nerve to wait; read the entire article in a flash. The theme and overall presentation of the article was enough to provide the necessary thrust to my concious and sub-conscious mind and to come out of a collision between to write a post and not to write a post, occuring in my mind for the last couple of weeks.

In the world of networking, one condition for successful transmission and reception of packets lies on the fact that packets should be transmitted in a collision free environment. Of course, one will advocate that there are advanced techniques, which ensures successful decoding of packets even if there is a bit of collision between the transmitted packets. Yes it is true, but only when the collided packets have different energy, not every time.

Now coming to the theme of this article, there are strong good wills surrounded by broad vision and there are egos in our everyday life. When egos of different people collide with each other, then natural as well as unnatural problems arise, be at home or in work places. Problems of these kind can never be sorted out in general, or can never be overcome by a stronger ego over a lighter ego; rather get multiplied into many folds – can be fatal in some cases. In addition to this, with egos of high order, preservation of self image and self identity gets contaminated with stubbornness, selfishness, unwillingness to compromise, unwillingness to forget and forgive others; does not matter how small or big the preservation is. Unless the person differentiates between the ego and strong will, he/she runs into a vicious circle of the self and the other, me – mine and you – yours; resulting in no respite in/from life. To come out from the jaws of egos a strong will is required, and one who exhibits tolerance and endurance and power to vanquish or punish the opponent, should also choose to forgive and forget instead.

Like the use of various collision resolution mechanisms or collision avoidance and collision detection mechanisms in networking to increase the throughput and successful transmission/reception of packets, there are definite needs of collision resolution/avoidance/detection mechanisms in the case of egos. A strong will with a broad vision is of course needed as a collision resolution mechanism or a means to overshadow the ego or to transform the failures into success and problems into solutions. Some times, it is the sheer acceptance of the facts and a solution there after, required to bring some one from the trauma of so called destruction or failure.

In some sense, one can say that it is the joy of giving or joy of being with/for others or joy of recognizing a life with full of uncertainties or the joy of responding to a cause in the society. But, one can argue with intellect that how and why should I give or respond or recognize or compromise?, or why me? Yes, these are absolutely right questions? And, yes, it is true that no answer will completely satisfy the “self” or the “I“. Some time it becomes a matter of survival also; quite impossible to accept though. But, what else do we have to offer – a debate is certainly inevitable! But, don’t you think most of the problems resulted out of ego or stubbornness or selfishness can simply be solved by the above means. Some times the little smile on our face or a small thank you or excuse me does the wonder for the other and hence for the self.

The joy of giving is obviously not related to give some thing in kind all the time. One can experience the joy of giving by simply accepting some thing or putting our legs on their shoes or showing some interests related to some facts or recognizing a cause. This not only brings smile on many faces, but also brings a means to live; to bring some one out from frustrations, including ourselves. Just remember how many times you were frustrated because your achievements and efforts went unrecognised. Same thing happens with others too. Can’t we help them by simply recognizing their good works or by gifting them a smile or praising for their achievements? These things of course are free of cost; then what forces us not to give and not to enjoy!

Some says, do not believe strangers, and I say all my friends were strangers; and yours too :). But, then where does the enemy come from? Enemy was there, and it will be there, in the form of ego, hate, frustration, dis-interest, non-recognition and many more and within the self and the other. It comes, collides and destroys our families, relationships, work place and society in large and creates the wide distinction and differentiation between the self and the other.

Aamjunta, what do you think? – opting joy of giving! or colliding with egos 🙂

A strong personality exhibits tolerance and endurance. It has the power to vanquish and punish an opponent, but chooses to forgive and forget instead. When we are egotistical, on the other hand, we demonstrate our weakness by answering a pebble with cannon.

PS: Interested readers can browse the original article Collision of Egos, published in the Times of India, dated: 24th Aug, 2010.

%d bloggers like this: